Trying to be positive and ‘better’ to make others feel better is what I’m giving up for Lent. ‘Being positive’ has to be one of my pet peeves. Finding joy, however, is my absolute favourite thing. Can you tell he difference? I feel I can only write about finding joy if this is within the […]
'Being Positive' and 'Finding Joy' are different Read Post »
I am a psychotherapist, with a specialism in trauma over the last 30 years, who has long been fascinated with the mind-body link and how we can encourage ease of physical movement with psychological and physical experiential exercises. I am also currently living with chronic pain since multiple abdominal surgeries, cancer and chemotherapy. Recently I
Is it helpful to talk with clients about the psychological aspects of their pain? Read Post »
I had [a therapist] that said being gay was “no big deal” to her. She was trying to comfort me that she wouldn’t be judgmental but when you’ve dealt with homophobia you also want it to be a big deal to your therapist. I was trying to talk about how it wrecked my life and
Same Is NOT Equal: why being non-judgemental does your LGBT clients a disservice Read Post »
संकल्प ‘I am well, I am happy, I am peaceful and at ease’, I said to myself, three times, focusing on my heart. I say this three times before my yoga nidra practice and three times at the end. Its called a Sankalpa in yoga, and means a positive intention or focus that you wish to
‘A Paradox of Neuroses and Wisdom’: reflections from my yoga mat Read Post »
I have been privileged to have been in the position to support many mothers having difficulties with, and experiencing pain in relation to, their teenagers over the years and in spite of being retired from psychotherapeutic work after 30 years of practice, this involvement has continued informally to a much larger degree since retirement within
How often have you been told “I want doesn’t get”? Today I want to talk about wanting and needing. And the importance of saying and of knowing, “I want“. That opening phrase, is problematic because it already hints at the fact that we should feel ashamed of wanting and even more so of expressing it.
“This New Year decide to accept nothing you don’t deserve”. I read this week in a jauntily, much shared, quote on Facebook. As a gestalt therapist I found this statement so disturbingly unhelpful, trite and shallow and I had to ponder for several hours how I wanted to respond. I decided I wanted to respond
This year you do not have to be good Read Post »
I have dedicated December as ‘Look after yourself month’ at Blue Skies. MIND – as a psychotherapist I know December is often a very stressful month for people with most of my referrals coming in January (straight after Christmas). Loss is experienced more acutely too. Family tensions and expectations, being busier at work and
Top Tips for December Read Post »
Let me introduce the 3-2-1 Survival Method©, which I have developed over three decades of working with clients with depression, anxiety, chronic illness, and in emergency situations of overwhelm and stress. While I have been in my own situation of illness I have been able to put this method into written form so that I
Surviving Overwhelm or Exhaustion Read Post »
What if you didn’t have long to live? I remember sitting with a client during a session while she was waiting for results of a cancer test. “What would you do if the results are positive and you have two years to live ?”, I dared to ask the unspoken question. “Quit my job, travel,
The question that is so important and the answer that is not. Read Post »