Sometimes we believe that if we can make better decisions we will improve things and we forget that part of life is the muddle, the mess and the maybes. “We call this the mud season.” my friend Nancy said, when we were discussing the energy of spring. In spring we plant seeds in hope of […]
Mud Season: The muddle, the mess and the maybes Read Post »
I had [a therapist] that said being gay was “no big deal” to her. She was trying to comfort me that she wouldn’t be judgmental but when you’ve dealt with homophobia you also want it to be a big deal to your therapist. I was trying to talk about how it wrecked my life and
Same Is NOT Equal: why being non-judgemental does your LGBT clients a disservice Read Post »
I have been privileged to have been in the position to support many mothers having difficulties with, and experiencing pain in relation to, their teenagers over the years and in spite of being retired from psychotherapeutic work after 30 years of practice, this involvement has continued informally to a much larger degree since retirement within
I’ve recently been reflecting on loneliness, yearning and longing, feelings that my clients often report and with which I am very familiar. Sometimes I long for another person, whether real or imaginary, and I’ve taken to considering, “Who is it, I long for?”. Is it that person, or is it the feeling I get when
The benefits of exquisite longing and of hope Read Post »
Gestalt Prayer I do my thing and you do your thing. I am not in this world to live up to your expectations, And you are not in this world to live up to mine. You are you, and I am I, and if by chance we find each other, it’s beautiful. If not, it
Connection, disconnection, adjustment Read Post »
I was always led to believe the saying, ‘actions speak louder than words’. There is no doubting the logic in this statement. However, through my work with couples and studying my own and other people’s ‘languages of love’, I have come to realise that actions speak louder for some than others, depending on their language
When words speak louder than actions: the language of love Read Post »
A re-write of my 2014 blog written for Valentine’s Day. I’m not a cynic and today is a good day to express my inner romantic and reflect on falling in love… I was with a client a few weeks ago discussing her relationship problems with her partner and we were remembering the stage in her
Love: is it 'blind' or 'second sight'? Read Post »