Exciting New Starts!

So, take a breath, drop your shoulders and let’s begin this course, slowly, gently and with ease. Imagine an autumn leaf, gently floating for a moment.

The Main Thing

With our plan for the winter we will not be attempting to do everything. As much as we might want to lose weight, exercise, read more, drink plenty of water, write our novel, decorate the bedroom and so on, we won’t benefit ourselves by running in several different directions at once. We are going to be finding out what The Main Thing is before we set off.

Stephen Covey writes, ‘The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing.’. When you are short on time or energy, when things are going wrong, I want you to return to this thought. The main thing can be anything, maybe for me it is to enjoy being alive and to keep my stress low. If I realise I haven’t drunk as much water as I wanted to for example, I don’t need to get sidetracked by this or disheartened because the main thing for me is to not get stressed and miserable this winter.

So we are going to use our joined up thinking to refine our understanding of our personal ‘main thing’. We will use writing exercises, meditation, drawing and discussion to deepen our sense of our main thing and by the end of the unit you will have your own mantra or saying that you will use throughout the course. In yoga this is called a Sankalpa.

The Habit

“The greatest loss, that of oneself, may pass unnoticed.”


We are working on a new habit. On average it takes 66 days to install a new habit and we have 160 days! On the topic of The Main Thing, we are installing the main habit, and this is to spend time each day with your inner guide, captain, wise woman. If this is a daily habit, to spend time with your heart centred reflection and wise thinking planning, all other habits that you wish to install will follow.

This week we have been looking at how you make this habit, where and when and next week we will begin to look at your own trouble shooting guide. The encouragement of the group will help us all to keep the main thing the main thing. Checking in with others will help this new habit become a way of life.

This habit is about connection with yourself.

Suggested activities: remember all activities are optional and can be done in any order at any time or not at all. As with all things, the more you engage the more you will get out of it, but a forced study or participation is counter productive.

If you haven’t already read the preparation week contents you can do so now, and the preparation videos are still available to watch. Click here.


Meditation: Opening meditation is below. It is about 20 minutes long, make space in your life to day dream, to relax and to find your inner wise woman and maybe someone else, as you take a guided journey… You might want to write in your journal afterwards. If you’ve done this in the last few weeks, here is Tending to Your Sore Heart and The Apple Orchard (from Taster Week).

Monday – Friday

Join us on Facebook: The daily threads are symbolised by a heart, a thinking bubble and a hand.

Reflective inner voice work will be symbolised by the heart; planning, strategies and awareness work will be symbolised by the thought bubble; and habit installation will be indicated by a hand symbol.

All the posts are under Week 1 in the Units section on facebook, and also here in full on my website (click here).

A potted version is found below for quick reference:


Monday 19th

Monday’s reflection is taken from ‘The Way of the Happy Woman: living the best year of your life’ by Sara Avant Stover.


Reflect on the quote, and on my video introduction and listen to your own responses within.


  1. Write in your journal.
  2. Introduce yourself to the group by posting a photograph of your journal and pen, and saying which part of the world you are from.


Tuesday 20th


Do a short meditation saying ‘hello’ to yourself, mind, body, spirit.

Ponder the idea of ‘no goals’ – what emotions arise?


Write in your journal about why you came to this course, what brings you here, what you hope for and wish to gain from the course.

Watch the Heart – Head – Hand presentation to understand the methodology of the approach we are using for the course.


1) Share your aims and objectives for the course with me and the group in the facebook thread. Comment on at least 3 other people’s posts. Consider how we might help each other and how we might ask for help.


Wednesday 21st

Read about The Paradoxical Theory of Change. What does this mean to you? What emotions arise?

Think back over your life about happiness. At what points have you achieved happiness by trying? Why is it so hard for this lesson to stick? If you were to BE right now what would be different?

Write in your journal.

Share in the group honestly how you’re getting on with installing this habit of journalling every day?


Thursday 22nd

Wise Woman in the Wood – visit via the meditation if you’ve not done so this year. Or revisit in your own mind, meditation.

Write in your journal.

Share a sentence or a paragraph here.



Friday 23rd

Write down, “What do you want?” / “What do you want, sweetie?”.

Ask yourself this question repeatedly for several minutes, don’t censor or judge what comes up, write ALL your replies down.

💭 star beside any you could easily fulfil


1) Take some time to reflect quietly with yourself and to write in your journal. Tell us here how you got on today.

2) Give yourself something that you want today.


week 1 body settling

week 2 breath awareness

week 3 thoughts arising

Introduction to the Self in Psychosynthesis during the campfire?



Week 2

Monday 26th

❣️ Who Am I? Meditation

Unlearn who they taught you to be quote

💭 Thoughts and Feelings arising


Tuesday 27th


Go through your ‘I want’ list again and now expand it. ‘I want because….’

Try to get to the need underneath.

Now put a star beside any you could EASILY fulfil.

Needs and wants


Wednesday 28th

I am I meditation


Thursday 29th 


Yoga breathing with Phillipa


week 2 breath awareness


Friday 30th


Mary Oliver poem



Week 3 2nd November

Tree meditation



💭 We are looking at and discussing a different list today. A list of ‘shoulds’. In Gestalt therapy we call these ‘introjects’ which means things we have taken in whole.

Make a list of your introjects or the hidden rules of life. To get the ball rolling I will put out there, “Don’t make a fuss” and “Don’t be selfish”.


I AM I short

refelction from SAStover




Find a conker


Tree yoga



❣️ After looking at your introjects in our sharing and discussion thread, take three core introjects that are adversely affecting your life and write yourself a permission slip.

‘It’s ok to …’ listen within, and write yourself a permission slip.



Week 4 – 9th November –

Psychosynthesis sense of self – conflicting needs and wants

Meditation to meet self





Tree yoga conker



Captain of Ship multiple personalities – how this fits with needs and wants

Self as a tree or captain


Cast list

Wise woman as distinct from tree




❣️💭 🤚 Heart – Head – Hand

Continue to reflect on your list of  ‘shoulds’ and ‘oughts’ or introjects, looking at how they have both served and restricted you. Add to the list.

Think about which to let go of like autumn leaves and which to hold on to.

Write a slogan, mantra or Sankalpa.

Sankalpa (Sanskrit: संकल्प) means an intention formed by the heart and mind — a solemn vow, determination, or will. In practical terms a Sankalpa means a resolve to focus both psychologically and philosophically on a specific goal.

Take action to ‘brain wash’ yourself!

Put your slogan on your screen saver, in notes on your phone, a memo on the fridge, on a piece of paper under your pillow, as the name of your waking alarm on your phone, in your journal, draw a design, make a poster, make your own meme, spray paint graffiti round your home town… 😜

Blog about Sankalpa on Blue Skies Blog

Take action to ‘brain wash’ yourself!

Put your slogan on your screen saver, in notes on your phone, a memo on the fridge, on a piece of paper under your pillow, as the name of your waking alarm on your phone, in your journal, draw a design, make a poster, make your own meme, spray paint graffiti round your home town… 😜


Video about the Psychosynthesis ship, crew and captain

Blog about the ship






Week 5  -16th November – DIHWALI

Listen to Miriam’s presentation on the Gestalt Cycle.

Sensation to mobilisation in particular with interruptions


feeling our feelings and relationship to addiction

feelings as visitors

tolerating and the already recorded feelings sentics

What would you harvest from earlier in the year and put away in your Gratitude Warehouse, to warm or encourage you this winter?

inventory of resilience

Gratitude 23rd November

Creative void week for Thanksgiving – reminder of why

Spend time with yourself quietly reflecting and or journalling.


The creative void


Emptiness as a meditation

make materials to repeat in the other void weeks


Week 7 -9 30th & 7th & 14th

Xmas and idealisation



Loss of self



Week 10 & 11 21st & 28th

The creative void


Emptiness as a meditation


John Donahue poem

Review of what went before

Look at what lies ahead


Winter as in 10 & 11


Nurture body care

14 & 15

Feelings & the ultimate resilience



1) Check in when you’ve spent some time reflecting quietly or journalling. How many times have you managed this so far this week, is this habit improving? 

2) Find a conker – I will explain why soon.


 ❣️   💭





Imagine you are holding in your hands a biography about YOU written about ten years after your death.

If the story of your life ended well, if it was a satisfying read, if the truth of your life so far turned into an inspiring tale, how would it go?


If you’ve completed that work you can make a list of your top ten happy times.


This week we are working on The Main Habit which is quiet personal reflection and journaling.

Did you spend time with you today?


Take a look at your ‘things to do list’, your daily routine and calendar and notice where you are truly spending most of your energy and time.

What dissonances do you notice?







Reminder: Guidelines for group participation 

Guidelines for group participation.

Be kind and do not criticise.

Joining as much or as little as it’s right for you.

Never discuss or disclose anything within the group to anyone outside the group.

No politics, no sales, no religion.


2) Check in here to say how you got on with this one new habit ?